Surviving a Borderline Parent: How to Heal Your Childhood Wounds & Build Trust, Boundaries, and Self-Esteem      by Kimberlee Roth, Freda B., Ph.D. Friedman, Randi Kreger  "Kimberlee and Freda's book draws on the insights of previous books concerning people in relationship with those who have borderline personality disorder. Having read this wonderful and very practical book, I can see why Randi Kreger wrote the forward.

As I read this book, I saw a very good but non-technical theme throughout the book. The term is never used, but the issue of co-dependency is addressed. Also, the way out is clearly outlined.

While written for adult children of parents with bpd, I see two more audiences to benefit from this book.

First, the children of those with this personality disorder who still live at home can benefit from this book. If used wisely by the non-bpd parent and/or the therapist of the family's children, it could help them greatly.

Second, those whose mother-in-law or father-in-law have this disorder will find practical help here in dealing with very challenging 'toxic in-laws.' Thank you very much for writing this book."

Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care About Has Borderline Personality Disorder      by Paul T. Mason, Randi Kreger, Larry J. Siever (This the only book written of its kind that I am aware of, and it is not only very well written, but I believe will help many families that are being hurt by borderline behavior. This book will assist families in understanding their loved one's behavior and thinking. It will help them understand what is going on inside the borderline when sometimes all the family can see is chaos. I believe this book will empower many families. It is important to remember that borderlines are not bad people and they (we) do not set out to hurt the very ones we love, but rather their cognitive distortions and chaotic behavior of course hurt those around them severely. This book should help you find your way).

The Stop Walking on Eggshells Workbook: Practical Strategies for Living With Someone Who Has Borderline Personality Disorder      by Randi Kreger, James Paul Shirley "Most non-borderlines who have a borderline in their lives are well aware of Randi Kreger's and Paul Mason's, M.S., blockbuster, eye-opening, best-seller *Stop Walking on Eggshells*, '98. This excellent workbook comes now in 2002 by Randi Kreger and James Paul Shirley, M.S.W., as a complement, supplement and added bonus. The workbook, *The Stop Walking on Eggshells Workbook: Practical Strategies for Living With Someone Who Has Borderline Personality Disorder* is a very helpful extension of that outstanding book *Stop Walking On Eggshells*.
The workbook is loaded with probing questions, exercises, action steps and 'self-tests'.
The confusing dialogue that a non-borderline has with a person with borderline personality disorder is explained here, sorted out and understood more in this dynamic workbook. The workbook presents a commitment and the action steps and skills do work in helping to set boundaries.
I urge the reader to use the workbook (SWOEW) in tandem with *Stop Walking On Eggshells*, even though there is some similar overlapping material in both books, SWOE, the book, is geared toward helping the reader understand what borderline personality is and the workbook is geared to what to do about it, how to use some coping skills and to apply the strategies.
Like *Stop Walking On Eggshells*, this workbook deserves many more stars than five. Combined, the two are as close as you can get to having the most complete information on borderline personality disorder there is available. The combination is significantly better than just using either one alone.

Shadow Syndromes      by John J. Ratey, Catherine Johnson "(Do you or a loved one have some symptoms of a mental illness(s), but not enough for a definitive diagnosis. You may be suffering from a Forme Fruste or Shadow Syndrome of that disorder. This book describes the Shadow syndrome and adds measure that even if not enough symptoms exist the symptoms still need to be treated. Discusses common disorders and their psychological and neurochemical basis and treatments of these disorders. An extremely important work that should be read by all. It could will your perception of mental illness. Highly Recommended)"

Dysinhibition Syndrome:  How to Handle Anger and Rage in Your Child or Spouse      by Rose Wood (I strongly recommend this book for any family member who is suffering from anger and rage from their loved one. It discusses in great detail how to manage this behavior in yourself and in treatment for the other person. There are not many books written for people that suffer this kind of "intermittent explosive disorder" and this book will help guide you). "Many people have problems with rage and anger control. These are usually blamed on purely psychological causes. This book shows that these problems are mostly biological and common to many disorders. Wood presents many techniques for controlling and living with them."

Surviving a Borderline Parent: How to Heal Your Childhood Wounds & Build Trust, Boundaries, and Self-Esteem by Kimberlee Roth, Freda B., Ph.D. Friedman, Randi Kreger "Although relatively common, Borderline Personality Disorder, or BPD, is often overlooked or misdiagnosed by therapists and clinicians and denied by those who suffer from it.

Symptoms of this tragic problem include unpredictability, violence and uncontrollable anger, deep depression and self-abuse. Parents with BPD are often unable to provide for the basic physical and emotional needs of their children. In an ironic and painful role reversal, BPD parents can actually raise children to be their caretakers. They may burden even very young children with adult responsibilities. They tend to demand unreasonable levels of emotional and material support from those least able to provide it. Plagued by irrational fears and anxieties, BPD parents often transfer feelings of self-hatred onto their children. salting the wounds inflicted by their insatiable need with constant denigration and abuse.

If you were raised by a BPD parent, your childhood was a volatile and painful time. This book, the first written specifically for children of borderline parents, offers step-by-step guidance to understanding and overcoming the lasting effects of being raised by a person suffering from this disorder. Learn what psychological criteria are necessary for a BPD diagnosis and identify the specific characteristics your parent presents. Discover specific coping strategies for dealing with issues common to children of borderline parents: low self-esteem, lack of trust, guilt, and hypersensitivity. Make the major decision whether to confront your parent about his or her condition."

Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself      by Melody Beattie (I cannot emphasize enough how important this book is. It is a classic! This book assisted me in getting out of a bad relationship. This book helped me get my mind off of other people and back onto myself and onto my own needs. I was not even aware of what my needs where as I was so focused on others. If you feel you are codependent in any way, without a doubt I recommend this book highly. It will set you free to be yourself). A reader from Beacon NY says "This book saved my sanity, my relationship, maybe even my life. I was going through major upsets in my relationship due to a partner's addiction. I was trying to "fix the world" one painful day at a time. When nothing happened except for me to lose hope, trust, faith and love, I turned to a friend for advice. She recommended this book to me. I was skeptical to try yet another DO IT YOURSELF book to fix what was wrong with me, but this one opened my eyes. For the first time ever, I saw the patterns of my actions leading me straight to heartache and frustration. The descriptions were right on target, I saw myself in every list. It was scary, yet encouraging, because I did not feel alone, nor did I feel I was too far gone to be helped. This book will be a fixture on my nightstand to get me through the weaker points in my life. Whenever I need to take a reality check and think of ME instead of that other person, I open the pages and let it heal me. Thank you, Ms. Beattie!"